Jess’s Lesson: Always Get Up Again

10 MINUTE READ • STUDENT STORIES

When I first thought of getting my high school diploma, I didn’t think I would be much different than the average high school student. I figured I’d go through the typical four years of studies and graduate on time in 2016. For me though, everything was always harder, tougher, and longer than I ever saw coming. When I first started high school in 2012, I was an above-average student who was involved in wheelchair basketball and track, I traveled all over the country and, in my sophomore year, I went to England to represent Team USA in track and field. I got the All-Academic Student Award for basketball for competing and maintaining a 3.4 or higher GPA.

Somewhere, though, things went wrong. I started running away and relationships at home were extremely tense. Eventually, my parents moved me to Queen Creek High because I was becoming “trouble” at my previous school. At Queen Creek, I was falling behind, skipping classes, and my mental health was deteriorating faster than I could handle. During the summer before my final year of high school, things reached a breaking point.

My parents noticed the self-destructive behaviors and realized for everyone’s best interest, including my own, I needed to be sent away. So, I spent my senior year in a therapeutic rehab boarding school. Needless to say, I was not happy. I felt like my parents didn’t want me anymore and they were handing me off to some counselor who was paid to listen to me speak. While I was there, I was very closed off and barely put any attention or concern towards my schooling. I left that rehab center after 11 months with little-to-no improvement in my mental health or in my relationship with my parents.

I first got involved with Grad Solutions in the last few months of 2016. It was exciting that I could take an online course and complete as much work as I wanted, whenever I wanted. In the beginning, I flew through my courses because I had the time and made the effort. But my life got hectic. I was still battling depression, anxiety, and toxic relationships. I stopped working on my online classes for months. I dropped out and eventually had to re-apply. In late 2017, I got involved with drugs and I was hardly ever doing anything but sleeping and getting high. That lasted for almost a whole year. Luckily though, through all that, I had the motivation to get past my self-hate and had my parents’ support to re-apply again to Grad Solutions.

Then a blessing came-my mentor, Mrs. Lorie Webster. She was the most supportive, understanding, and empathetic woman I have ever met. She was the person I needed so terribly while I was going through such hard times. When I went weeks without any progress, she would message me, asking me if I was okay and if there was anything she could do to help. She would encourage and inspire me by telling me her own struggles and how strong we both must be to get through the rough patches in life.

A year after continuous drug abuse, mental slavery, and detachment from everything and everyone, I experienced a revelation. I could not bear to put myself or my family through this any longer, so I sobered up. Somehow, I whipped myself into shape and I set the goal of finding a job and finishing high school. I didn’t want to see my parents constantly worry about me. Drug addiction really does make you realize how fast life can be taken from you. Through the process of recovery, I realized how much I love and care about my parents.

I wanted my parents to be proud of me and to see me flourish into the strong, smart, happy, young woman I knew I could be. The day after I got sober, I had a job interview at Sephora, my first job opportunity since October of 2017. I was so nervous, I looked in the mirror the morning of the interview and said, “You’re a drug addict, Jess, you amount to nothing, and the chance you’ll get this job is slim-to-none,” but when I am determined to do something, I won’t ever give up. I went to the interview and got the job! That was uplifting and a confidence boost. I enjoyed working around people who loved the same things I did. This helped me have more confidence in school and I wanted to finish my courses.

My relationship with my parents, especially my mom, started becoming closer than ever. I found my best friend in my mom, and that was exactly what I needed to feel and see. I could now go to my mom with stress, anxiety, worries, and accomplishments. It was so comforting. My mom was the person I thought about every time I wanted to do drugs again, any time I felt like I wasn’t enough. Her smile and voice drove me to continue my fight for success every morning.

Months ago, I would have never seen myself graduating, but tonight I stand here, as a graduate. I did it, I made it! I could not have done it without the support from my parents and the bond I made with Mrs. Webster. Together, we created such an uplifting and encouraging mentor-student friendship. I wanted to show her that even through tough changes, I could still accomplish so much. She held my hand throughout the whole process and never once judged me or told me she was disappointed in me. And with my parents’ unconditional love and support that filled my heart, I could find love for myself.

Now, I’m in a community college, I have a job, and my relationship with my mom and dad is the strongest it has ever been. The desire to do drugs is gone completely. I have a goal of completing my bachelor’s degree in psychology. I work hard every day for a healthy, happy, and successful future.

I see the light and love in life. I exude it to everyone and everything I come across. Life is a journey with crazy twists and turns. I have fought many battles, but I will never give up. I’ve found myself and what I love! With my parents by my side, I’m indestructible! I know hard days will come as life is full of struggles and stress, but I stay focused and remain grateful for the air in my lungs and the blessing that life is. I owe it to myself to live a beautiful life! I say to myself, “One day, you’re going to look at everything you’ve manifested and be thankful you never gave up when you really wanted to.”

And to you, my fellow graduates, look at all we have overcome. Sure, your stories and struggles may not be the same as mine, but I know we all went through something. We completed an amazing milestone today and we deserve this moment and to feel proud. I am proud of each and every one of you and I know we all will continue to do great things no matter what life throws at us. Whenever you’re feeling down, remember this moment. Remember you accomplished this.

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