Stop Worries from Defeating You
Have you ever seen a bog? Neither have I. I’ve only read about them but they sound like something from a nightmare. You know, the kind where you are running, trying to get away somewhere. You keep pushing but your feet won’t move? A bog is like that. The more you resist, the more stuck you get. I imagine it’s a lot like quicksand, but I’ve never seen that either.
Our worries are similar to bogs. They seem like normal thoughts but the more you think about them, the more they bring you down. The negative feelings that come from them are a normal part of being human but some problems feel so big, they are hard to stop worrying about. This kind of ongoing worry can be debilitating, meaning that it can stop us from moving forward. We need to be able to find a way to move past our issues. This helps us grow and mature so we become people that can make a contribution to the world.
The Antidote
Most problems can be put into one of two categories: in our control or out of our control. Problems within our control are things that we can do something about. For these problems, taking command of them is the antidote to stop worrying.
Many self-help professionals suggest ways to take control of the problems we face. Generally, their advice can be summarized like this:
Write the problem down.
Is there a simple solution? If so, then do it.
Write down possible solutions.
Decide what is the best solution.
Act on the solution.
In some situations, acting quickly is critical, even life-saving. In some cases, you might have to take risks, but the risks are worth it.
Remember that if the first plan doesn’t work, you can always try again! If you need help or advice, look for the supportive people around you and ask! Most of the time, people are willing to help, you just need to talk to them.
Give room for feelings
Often, writing down things in a journal or talking to someone who you trust can help you deal with things that you can’t change. This gives room to ask yourself what you are learning from the situation and how you might grow from it. If you don’t have someone who you trust, talking to a counselor or clergyman from a church is a good way to go. These people may have experience talking with people who face similar problems as you.
There are also free counseling sessions available at non-profit organizations like Chicanos Por La Causa. At Grad Solutions, our mentors are wonderful listeners and counselors too. They are there to listen to students and help them through their struggles.
Accepting Acceptance
The idea of acceptance can be hard to accept. It is counterintuitive for humans to let perceived problems exist. A writer, Charlie Scaturro says, “Acceptance doesn’t mean that we like what we’re accepting. It simply means that we’re seeing reality as it is.” We can let ourselves be strengthened by worries, or broken by them. Acceptance allows you to become a stronger person and move on to other things in your life.
Worry is a normal part of life, but excessive worry can prevent us from accomplishing the work that we were meant to do or having the life we want to live. When you take actions to stop worrying, you will grow as a person. You will find more meaning and purpose because you have freed yourself from things that were weighing you down. You alone have the ability to stop worry from having power over your life.
